Starting Over Financially in Your 20’s
Coming straight out the gate, I think it’s pretty clear that being in your 20s comes with a whole hoax of challenges and obstacles that many of us 20-somethings didn’t feel prepared for. As SZA plainly says “How could it be? 20 something, all alone still not a thing in my name.” It’s easy in today’s world to not feel enough, like if we haven’t achieved x,y, and z milestones, we must be doing something wrong. In reality, there is so much more that goes into play. We were all dealt different cards in life, have different lessons to learn and experience, and as a result, will have different life circumstances.
When it comes to finances, and becoming financially independent and stable, many of us in our 20s are finding it hard to meet the expectations of some of the generations before. With changing industries and all the ways society is pivoting, the rules aren’t as straightforward. Many of us may have lost our jobs, careers, and life path direction recently. This redirection may have left many of us in a place of loss, feeling as if we have to start over. There’s no denying how terrifying the reality of this can be. While we never want to allow fear to completely consume us, denying it doesn’t do us any service either.
If you're someone who’s in a position where you feel like you’re having to start over financially, or maybe you are just trying to get back on your feet, know that you’re not alone. The shame that can come with not being somewhere we feel like we’re “supposed” to be can be worse than the actual reality we’re facing. It’s really challenging receiving mixed societal messages around self-love and self-care, while simultaneously different industries utilize marketing tactics that portray the message that if this isn’t going on in your life, then you’re not enough or you’re a failure. It’s pretty ironic and sobering because almost every single young person I’ve ever talked to feels this exact same way.
We can often believe and buy into this illusion that someone else has it all figured out because of what they’re presenting externally, but if we get to the core of our humanity, we can see that everyone is lost and trying to figure out things in their own unique way. Having to start over financially isn’t purely about the material or physical repercussions, it’s also the highly charged emotions that come with it as well.
My main message around finances and if you’re having to start over financially isn’t about giving you a long list of tips and tricks on how to budget, side hustle, or get ahead. My message is one of self-compassion, and a willingness to meet yourself where you are in life without the shame and pain of pressure and expectation. There are so many blessings that can potentially come with a start-over. This sense of unknown and newness is invigorating to the human spirit, if we allow it to be. When our minds try to come in and tell us how not enough we are because we aren’t accomplished in certain ways, those are the moments to consciously course correct and return back to self-compassion again and again and again. It is my intention that this short read may have instilled some hope in you if you are someone who is currently struggling. Know you are not alone in the struggle and reframing our viewpoint of a starting over point can make all the difference in the world.